What Really Helps

It’s not some motivational book sitting on the shelf at the grocery store, looking like the title alone has you figured out. It’s not a handful of inspiring quotes sitting around on your walls to remind you that you’re a wonderful person.

And it is most definitely not someone holding your hand and telling you everything will be all right.

What really helps you become a better you is time. Time and a genuine desire to be better. It’s how you react to the world around you. It’s knowing that your reactions aren’t good or bad, that there is no single action that is supremely evil or inherently good. But there are actions that are who you are and actions that are who you aren’t.

The problem with all these self-help books (and I’m not by any means bashing them – there are some really good tips in some of them) is that they generalize. They don’t know who you are. They can’t tell you exactly how to let go of your past and embrace who you are. Only you can tell yourself how to be yourself.

So, how do you do that when you’re feeling completely lost and confused? How can you get help from yourself when you don’t really even know who you are?

I don’t know. I really don’t know. I haven’t figured it out yet. But, as Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “Life is a journey, not a destination.”

Maybe the best way to help yourself be a better you is to just keep going. Make decisions, take risks, and put yourself first. Sacrifice for the greater good may be necessary sometimes, but it should never be the first thing you do.

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